5/6/13 - Melbourne
So, the Fear has started. I woke up from a nightmare this morning, set in the near future, when I had returned home. It was only the second day since I had been back and I was already screaming in the mirror with boredom and frustration.
There's no escaping it; the clock is ticking and in a few months I am due to go home. If it was up to me, I would be staying on the road a lot longer. Even if I had to leave Australia there are many more places out there to see before moving back and settling down.
Don't get me wrong I will love to go home and see all of my family and friends who I have missed terribly, and even new additions I haven't met yet. But that novelty will soon wear off, and then what have I got? Well, nothing. I'm heading back to no job, no home and the complete unknown with no plan whatsoever. Those prospects don't excite me too much. Starting from scratch, having to find a "career"... that's not exactly easy in the UK right now.
As always, the book I'm reading is reflecting my thoughts perfectly. And yet again, set in the much written about town of Pondicherry...
'I am not sure what it will be like, going home and picking up and starting again. In a way it feels braver than anything else I have done, and certainly it is more frightening than coming to India ever was.'
- Emily Barr, The Life you Want